Myths About Men in Maternity Care and Why They’re Wrong

Growing up in Nigeria, I was surrounded by cultural norms that made maternity care seem like a woman’s world. From pregnancy to childbirth, men were often considered outsiders, uninvolved in the process except for providing financial support. As I delved deeper into midwifery and personal growth, I realized how much harm these beliefs have caused—not only to women but to families as a whole.

Let me share some myths I’ve encountered about men in maternity care and why I, as a man deeply involved in this field, believe they are completely wrong.

Myth 1: “Maternity care is a woman’s responsibility.”

This was something I believed for years. Society taught me that pregnancy and childbirth were “women’s issues,” and my role was limited to financial provision.

What Changed My Mind:

As a student midwife, I’ve seen firsthand how important it is for fathers to support their partners during pregnancy. I’ve watched men who attended antenatal appointments and actively participated in care improve their partner’s confidence and well-being. The truth is, maternity care isn’t just about women; it’s about families. Men can—and should—be involved in every step of the journey.

Myth 2: “Men don’t belong in the delivery room.”

When I started my clinical rotations, I often heard people say, “Delivery is not for men. You’ll just get in the way.” But I quickly learned how wrong that was.

My Experience:

I’ve stood by women during labor, sometimes as the only comforting voice in a stressful environment. I’ve seen the relief and gratitude in the eyes of mothers when their partners are present. It’s not about doing the medical work—it’s about offering emotional strength. For Nigerian men, stepping into the delivery room is a powerful way to show love and support.

Myth 3: “Men don’t need to learn about pregnancy.”

I used to think that understanding pregnancy and childbirth was unnecessary for men. After all, wasn’t it the woman’s body? How wrong I was.

What I’ve Learned:

Education is everything. Knowing the signs of complications like preeclampsia or labor progression can save lives. In Nigeria, where maternal health resources are often stretched thin, an informed father can advocate for his partner and ensure timely medical intervention. Learning about pregnancy doesn’t make you less of a man; it makes you a better one.

Myth 4: “Men who get involved in maternity care are weak.”

This myth still lingers in our society. Men who show emotional support are often mocked or dismissed as weak.

Why I Disagree:

It takes strength to be vulnerable, to care deeply, and to prioritize your family. In my journey, I’ve realized that emotional support is as vital as financial provision. Men who are involved in maternity care aren’t weak—they’re strong, compassionate leaders in their families.

Myth 5: “Maternity care is only about the mother and baby.”

This was a big one for me. I thought my role was to wait outside while the “real work” happened inside.

What Opened My Eyes:

Pregnancy and childbirth aren’t just medical events; they’re life-changing experiences for the whole family. Being present during my clinical practice, I’ve seen how men who actively engage in this process create stronger bonds with their partners and babies. It’s not just about witnessing life—it’s about being part of it.

Myth 6: “Men will only get in the way.”

I used to fear that I’d make things worse if I got too involved. I didn’t want to mess up or seem out of place.

My Breakthrough:

The more I participated in maternity care, the more I saw how valuable men can be. Whether it’s carrying the hospital bag, holding a hand during contractions, or advocating for a partner’s wishes, men add value. We’re not in the way—we’re part of the team.

Myth 7: “It’s embarrassing for men to discuss pregnancy.”

In our conservative Nigerian culture, many men shy away from discussing pregnancy, seeing it as taboo or embarrassing.

Why I’m Breaking the Silence:

I’ve learned to embrace these conversations, and they’ve changed my perspective. Talking about pregnancy doesn’t diminish masculinity—it enhances understanding and empathy. The more we normalize these discussions, the more we can support our families and communities.

Myth 8: “Men should focus on providing financially, not emotionally.”

For a long time, I thought my worth as a future husband and father would be measured by my ability to provide financially. But there’s more to being a man than money.

What I Now Believe:

Emotional support is priceless. Holding your partner’s hand, listening to her fears, and being present through it all are just as valuable as financial contributions. In my journey, I’ve seen how a father’s emotional involvement strengthens the family bond and improves outcomes for both mother and baby.

Myth 9: “Men don’t bond with babies until after birth.”

This myth couldn’t be further from the truth. I’ve seen fathers bond with their babies before they’re even born—talking to the bump, feeling kicks, and dreaming about the future.

My Perspective:

Bonding starts early. When men take part in prenatal activities, they build a connection that lasts a lifetime. This early involvement creates a foundation for active fatherhood.

Myth 10: “Men have no role in postnatal care.”

Many believe that once the baby arrives, a father’s job is done. This couldn’t be more wrong.

What I’ve Witnessed:

In Nigeria, where postpartum depression and maternal exhaustion are often overlooked, fathers who step in to share responsibilities make a world of difference. Changing diapers, helping with night feeds, and giving the mother time to rest are all ways men can show love and care.

Why This Matters to Me

As a student midwife and a man, breaking these myths isn’t just theoretical for me—it’s personal. I’ve seen the transformative power of male involvement in maternity care. It strengthens families, improves maternal and child health, and fosters deeper emotional connections.

Nigeria has a long way to go in normalizing male involvement in maternity care, but I’m proud to be part of this change. I hope my story inspires more men to step up, challenge these myths, and embrace their roles in this incredible journey.

What Do You Think?

Have you encountered any of these myths? What are your thoughts on men’s involvement in maternity care? Share your experiences and let’s keep the conversation going!